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The Other Side of Grief

Facing grief, living with grief, the other side of grief - Discover the transformative power of love in the midst of heartbreak and loss.


Grief is a funny thing. Some might argue it is the worst of all human experiences. After all, what pain or sufferance would you not rather endure than the loss of a loved one? It’s the very nature of love to care more for their well-being than for yourself, and in principle this is hardly a bad thing.

The fact is nearly all of us face grief at some point in our lives. We may not want to, and not one of us experiences it the same as another, but we all do. Contrary to some popular belief, grief may not only occur after a death – but always after a loss. Therein lay the key to understanding our grief; at the end of the day, grief is just love. It’s the hard side of love, the part where you cannot live without them but must anyway. It’s the heartache, the inconsolable sorrow, the anger – after all, how could it ever be right? People who share a bond of love can’t be parted; we know in the very depth of our soul that's not how it should be. And we are right, in the grand scheme of things.

Man starring across the sea, the longing of grief

Anyone who knows anything will always tell you to accept your grief. Whether you are angry, sad, or even numb, give yourself time. Grief is a process, and that is ok. It’s normal – and the fact that you grieve a little differently to everyone else is also entirely normal. Once, in the midst of grief, someone gave me a life changing piece of advice - and I want to share it with all of you:

Lean into it. Grief is love - so love. Loss and heartbreak don’t mean you need to limit your love. Love until it hurts and then love a little more. You will face the loss, the pain, the sorrow, the anger. You will live through the injustice and the sufferance, that is part of the process. You don’t have to be ok.

But remember grief is only one side of love. It’s the longing – and you only have it because you already have the other powerfully resounding in your heart, the love that swells and cries out across every boundary. Not time, distance, circumstance or even the shadowy veil of death can limit love. Love transcends them all. So, love, love until you cry, love until you laugh, keep loving until grief simmers and all that’s left is love. There is room in your heart for all that is and ever will be, and that unbearable, beautiful love as well.

So, love. Just love, and know that there is no one you have known and loved whom you will not meet again.


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